We all say we’d go to the ends of the earth for our child, but one local woman actually did. Bonnie Pobiner, an associate director of gastroenterology with GlaxoSmithKline, traveled to Siberia just a few months ago to pick up her daughter, Anastasia, from an orphanage in Komsomolsk-na-Amure, located in the Khabarovsk region in far eastern Russia.

The Journey
Pobiner’s journey started nearly two-and-a-half years ago when she filed the initial application with the agency in September of 2005.

“For me, it was never a question of if I would have children, it was a matter of when. As it became apparent that I would not likely have a family the traditional way, I started to think about my options,” explained Pobiner, 48, who is a single parent. “I knew several people with adopted children, all beautiful and well-adjusted children from both domestic and foreign adoptions.”

Pobiner chose Russia in large part because ancestors on both sides of her family emigrated from Russia in the late 1800s. By February of 2006, Pobiner had completed the rigorous paperwork, approvals and coursework associated with adoption, including a homestudy report and status checks regarding her finances, employment, homeownership and health insurance, all of which had to be notarized and placed in her dossier. It was then that she learned about Anastasia, or Ana, who was just 21 months at the time.

This is where the “ends of the earth” come in. In March of 2006, Pobiner traveled from here to JFK, followed by a 1--hour flight to Moscow. From there, she made the eight-and-a-half hour flight to Khabarovsk, the region’s capital, followed by an overnight train ride to Komsomolsk-na-Amure, the location of Ana’s orphanage.

“I visited Ana for several hours over the course of two days during the first trip, and well before the end of those two days I knew that I wanted to be Ana’s mom,” said Pobiner. “Ana must have felt the bond as well. ... We each cried when it came time to say goodbye.”

Pobiner’s documents were filed with the local court to be reviewed by the regional judge, an important step in bringing Pobiner’s adoption closer to reality.

A waiting game
But in May of 2006, Pobiner received bad news. Her adoption was one of many that would be delayed as all U.S. agencies were forced to wade through Russian government bureaucracy to be reaccredited. So instead of bringing home Ana in June, Pobiner would have to wait. Many prospective parents are facing a similar waiting game now with planned adoptions of Guatemalan children. The time passes slowly.

“I was able to get a few updates via my adoption agency on Ana’s progress and a few photos, though I was not allowed to have any direct contact with her during this period,” said Pobiner. “To keep my spirits up, I held a fundraiser in the spring of 2007 to raise money for Ana’s orphanage and was able to raise $3,500 through friends and family. They are now using the money to buy equipment for physically impaired orphans.”

Back to Siberia
Nearly 18 months passed since she’d last seen Ana when Pobiner learned in July of 2007 that her agency, Cradle of Hope, had been one of the first agencies to receive reaccredidation. On Sept. 29 Pobiner left for Siberia to pick up her daughter.

When she returned home, she sent an announcement to all the friends and family who had supported her emotionally throughout the long wait. It began: “This miracle, this life, now my daughter ...” and included both Ana’s birth date and adoption date.

Life in the Pobiner house is lively now with Ana and two cocker spaniels, Meg and Ellie. The biggest surprise so far? Ana’s acceptance of Pobiner as “Mama.”

“That is what I have always been to her,” says Pobiner. “Of course Ana will know her adoption story, but right now I guess she must think that children are in a place waiting until Mama comes to get them. Ana was so funny, upon our reunion she ran around the room after hugging me, and it was almost as if she was saying ‘Where have you been, that was a long trip to the grocery store!’”

Other than the wait, Pobiner describes her adoption experience as wonderful, noting Ana’s caregivers were hardworking and caring, showing Ana pictures that Pobiner had left on her first visit. She was pleased with Cradle of Hope too. “The staff was great to interact with; they put me in touch with other adoptive parents before I made my final selection of them.”

A new daughter
As for Ana, who will be four in May, she’s adjusted beautifully. “The biggest compliment I hear from people is how happy Ana is,” says Pobiner. “She just seems to take everything in stride yet with the wonderment of childhood. She is so self-assured. There are many times I think to myself ‘You’ve been in an orphanage almost your whole life ... what is up with this?’ I am so incredibly proud to be her mama.”

The road to parenthood is often long and winding, no matter how we go about it. If you’re considering adoption, Bonnie Pobiner welcomes e-mails or questions about her experience. E-mail Bonnie at bpobiner@nc.rr.com.